I’ve known for years about about faceless aliens. I started blogging about them in 1975 and it’s all been suppressed by the government. Finally we get some good quality photos from the press. No denying it now, they are taking over.

Jingle Luis, a 15yr old teenager from the Philippines, came to New York so doctors could uncoil her severely clubbed feet. The surgery was a success and for the first time she is able to wear normal shoes.

Her feet were really jacked, there’s no dancing around that…literally. Da da tshhhhh

My homey sent me this blog that exists to tell the story of this sad, disgusting cat named Chase. Apparently the cat got into some horrific accident when it was 4 weeks old and survived. I’m guessing it had a run in with a lawn mower or someone tried to shave it’s face with a machete. The owners didn’t have the heart(guts?) to put it out of it’s misery, but instead have decided to show photos to us all of how “well” the cat is. Well, you be the judge of that.

Pruthviraj Patil, an 11yr old boy, has suffered from hypertrichosis since he was born. Hypertrichosis is a rare genetic condition known as Werewolf Syndrome and it’s believed only 50 people in the entire world suffer from it. They have tried laser treatments to remove the hair but it just keeps growing back.

I like the ankle jewelry in this next one.

This is no joke, this little guy is a body builder and these pictures are hilarious. This pic looks like the dwarf is the trophy the guy won in a competition. Just need to paint him gold and have him hold a sign. And what’s the normal guys excuse for those socks?

What the frrr is that animation on his crotch? This is very disturbing, looks like he’s wearing some Disney diapers of some sort. And what the heck is going on with socks over there, somebody give these people some normal socks.

Is there anyway I can get this poster sized and framed? I don’t know what’s going on with this outfit, but it really is unsettling.

Can someone tell me what the hell is happening to my finger. This is the second time on this same spot on my finger this has happened. The first time it didn’t get nearly this big. I thought it was an ingrown hair on my finger, I yanked out the hair, popped it and put some neosporin on it and all was well. It went away completely. Then about a week after than this one started and it got huge. I’ve popped it several times but it comes back bigger and badder each time. My hole hand is starting to hurt.

This thing predates the T-Rex and looks like the evil arch enemy of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles….Brain. I’ll include a couple pictures for comparison.

and now the brain…

South Africa has some interesting days ahead. Jacob Zuma is the new leader of the African National Congress. The next president will be appointed by the ANC and Zuma looks to be in the on deck circle. Now you’re thinking, “wow Kyle really is up to speed on African politics, this is an interesting blog piece, I wonder what his thoughts are on economic progress throughout developing countries.” I’m not as shallow as you think, but this is where this post makes U-turn at the deep end, puts the floaties on and heads back to safer waters.

Jacob Zuma likes his women, even if they don’t like him or just don’t know they like him yet. He has at least 4 wives and 20 children, but he’s not quite your stereotypical polygamist family man. At least not the stereotype I’ve developed from watching Big Love. He also likes to rape women. He’s been charged with corruption and rape. His response to the rape charges are priceless. Here are some particularly charming quotes:

Confronted with the rape charge, Zuma took the old “short skirt” excuse, claiming it was his duty as a Zulu warrior to have sex with a woman if she wore a short kanga (an African wrap) and that he could not leave her “unfulfilled.”

Am I the only one who didn’t know the “short skirt” excuse was old? Maybe it’s like insanity defense in the US.

Zuma told the court that he knew the woman was “clearly aroused” by the fact that her kanga was “quite short” — meaning knee-length.

“In the Zulu culture, you cannot just leave a woman if she is ready,” he explained in court.

According to Zuma’s defense, Zulu men have sexual primacy over women. Therefore, he could not be guilty.

“To deny her sex, that would have been tantamount to rape,” he claimed.

I’m guessing the woman he raped has a different interpretation of “ready” and “aroused”. No means yes, her slapping him and fighting back was just role playing apparently. The woman was HIV positive at the time of the incident and Zuma doesn’t seemed too concerned.See Mr. Zuma has extensive medical training and here’s why he knows he’s safe despite not wearing a condom:

“I had a shower afterwards”

I kid you not. And there’s also the matter of Zuma facing 12 counts of fraud, one count of money laundering, two counts of corruption and one charge of racketeering. I was having a hard time choosing between our current presidential nominees, but now I have some real perspective.

I have many leather bound books…

An American doctor went over to see the tree man and gave the brother some hope. I was thinking it was going to be more like a vet visit where he was just gonna recommend he be “put down”. I guess that’s why I’m not in the medical field. So it looks like tree-man has HPV which normally can cause small warts. But tree man has a rare genetic fault that prevents his immune system from doing really anything it should. So HPV run a muck in his body and he has grown what they call “cutaneous horns” or what I like to call “uglaneous lizard bark”. Good for you tree man, get well brother!